Forgiveness

Why Lord, do I leave your house on Saturday night or Sunday morning ready to do battle with the worst of this world -- only to join in with the worst the next day. Why am I a traitor of your love? I betray you for temporal things! Father, forgive me for feasting on your word one day a week, while living a starvation diet the rest of the week, expecting to be sustained. Starving, reverting to selfishness and survival mode – forgetting my brother, forgetting you! Father, forgive me for returning when my clothes have been ripped and I have spit on your sacrifice. Jesus, forgive me that:

revivals at the altar
last only the night
begun in the Spirit,
carried in my might
and failure at light.

That I’m too tough to have a broken heart – too tough for God – please forgive me Lord! Forgive me that I can not be told apart from the world. Transform and revive my heart! Give me boldness to speak your Truth to those who will persecute and scoff at me. Bring my desire for worth back to your feet. Give me a new hunger for your word and a desire for intimacy with you alone! Your heart is anguished – and anguish I want! I want to taste like salt so others will give you glory!